Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Feeling Goo-ey Today

If small children saw me they'd cry. Others would certainly turn away in disgust, or stare with curiosity.

I had laser skin resurfacing on each of my cheeks today to try to get rid of the areas darkened by pimple scars. Yes, I've created this face of circus sideshow freak status on my own doing. The scars aren't very noticeable, especially not when I wear make-up, but I wanted them gone.

Earlier in the summer I had 6 sessions of microdermabrasion and chemical peels to take away individual pink spots also. Those treatments worked great and really made my skin look a lot better, so I was really looking forward to my laser appointment to try to get rid of the darkness that has still remained.

Laser is a little more intense than the microderms and chemical peels, so besides the redness the other two can cause, my skin is also oozing a little pus and has a few tiny places where blood is spilling, kind of like if I were pricked by a needle. To protect the vulnerable fresh skin that is now exposed, I have large globs of Aquafor rubbed across my cheeks. Can you picture how bizarre I look?

I realized how odd it is that I've done all this to myself. Kids, don't pick those pimples! I didn't like the way I looked way back when I was a pimple-face teen, so I would pick at the pimples (with the drive and intensity of a monkey picking for termites) to try to make them look better. But instead I got scabs and scars. Now as an adult, I don't like the look of the scars on my face, so I have paid the good doctor to use a mini-sandblaster, acid, and lasers to make it look better. But instead I've got blood, pus, and globs of goo. When will it end? (3 to 5, days I hope).

I also was thinking about how vain and shallow having these procedures seems. I like who I am and I'm okay with how I look. But I still wanted to the procedures and even got teary-eyed thinking my pimple scars could be gone and I could look like a real adult instead of an over-age teen. Am I really okay with how I look? Or am I trying too hard to fit the mold of conventional beauty? I think it's a little of both, in varying amounts on different days.

I can tell you one thing that is not part of the mold of conventional beauty, though. Pus, blood, and globs of goo on your cheeks. It's very unbecoming. I hope these 3 to 5 days of unsightliness and healing go quickly.

Sunday, September 12, 2004

My Poor, Poor Husband

I don't have pity for my dear hubby because of how I behaved in the bars last night (I'll get to that in a minute), I have pity for him because he has been working on a huge, huge project at work for the last two months and it's supposed to all be done and ready to go live tomorrow morning. It's a web application for his company and it is muy, muy importante. Uh oh. He's in super crunch mode because they've had to make a bunch of last minute changes, and some of those changes are causes big problems. The poor dear was so crazily over-stressed this morning I thought he as going to break down and cry. He sounded like he was in such a sad state. Last time I talked to him though, things were looking better. But, unfortunately, the clock is still ticking and the project isn't done.

Others would probably have pity on him for my behavior in the bar last night. I went to St Cloud with a bunch of gals for my friend's bachelorette party. I am not a partier by any stretch of the imagination. I never went to college and never went to any of the college parties when I was of college age. I don't like the taste of alcohol, so I hardly ever drink. In the right mood though, I'll do shots. If I'm ever having a drink it's only with the intention of becoming, shall we say, under the influence. Shots are much quicker to get down.

My husband loves to drink and loves for me to drink, so I figured I'd have a couple drinks (well, shots) before I went home. Instead of buying my drinks, though, I kept asking guys to buy my shots for me. It was so easy! And I even made it very clear that I was very happily married and not looking to stray. They still bought me drinks! And these weren't even dorky, desperate guys...I was getting drinks from the hotties. And not just for me, most of them also bought drinks for at least a friend or three also. Yahoo, I totally won the get-free-drinks game. At one point a friend wanted a drink and had me talk a guy into getting one for her since I had perfected the art. She's quite a looker, so she could have easily persuaded some shmuck herself, that's what a roll I was on.

And as for pitying my husband. There's no need, unless it's over the whole work thing. He thought it was a riot to hear about my adventure as a drinking woman. So all said and done, I got really drunk and helped my friends get drunk...all for a $2 cover charge...I know! What a steal! And I didn't even get sick or wake up with a hangover.

Anti-nakey Vision Insurance

If there was such a product to buy from an insurance salesman, I'm sure my son would be in line to get it. After seeing his mom nakey yesterday morning and being totally grossed out by it, my son made sure to turn his back when he came up the stairs to see us this morning. I saw that he was turned around and figured that's what he was doing so I told him it was okay to look, that I was wearing clothes. Only then would he turn around. I wonder how long before he's not mortified anymore.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure he'd buy the total coverage insurance to not see anyone nakey, and maybe a while down the road he'd drop that down to a policy for only not seeing family nakey. Something similar to dropping from total coverage car insurance to only liability once you're car is paid off.

Saturday, September 11, 2004


My alarm went off a few minutes ago to wake me up. Of course the first thing I did was get out of bed and walk across the hall to the bathroom to turn it off. I keep my alarm there hoping I'll wake up a little by actually getting out of bed and be less likely to hit snooze. I usually sleep naked, especially on warm nights like we had last night, so I had nothing on when I went to turn off my alarm.

Here's the oops part: my son was in the bathroom waiting to be a nice little guy and turn it off for me. His bedroom is downstairs and I'm usually a light enough sleeper that I hear him if he comes upstairs. Even when he's quiet enough to stalk a zebra. I didn't hear him this time though. Either he got quieter or I fell back asleep really hard (I hit snooze the first time my alarm went off).

The alarm buzzed, I got up to turn it off, stepped nakedly into the hallway, then jumped and eeked a quietish eek when I realized he was standing there. I knew it'd totally gross him out to see his mother naked, or nakey as they say on the Nickelodeon cartoon Rugrats, so I apologized a few squeaky sorries as I ran back to get my robe. He had turned his back and didn't turn back around until I said it was okay and I was wearing my robe.

He's ten and he hates the idea of boys liking girls in "that" kind of way. I've probably just lessened my chances of him ever getting married and giving me grandchildren. Rats!